somebody snuck up and got me drunk
so i just googled the prescription for aldara i saw on your desk this morning...
he kept refering to his penis as the "eternal sunshine"
I just blindly shoved it in. I'm still not sure which hole I got.
Just assessed the damage in the bath. Two love bites. One bruise on the inner thigh. Strange awareness of what i'm assuming is my cervix. I've definitely missed you. x
At some point we were all eating banana flavored rolling papers.
I'm getting flash backs of last night. They're coming in song form.
Just saying goodbye until I figure this whole "warrant out for my arrest" thing
I'm going out with a guy whose nickname is Shark Week cause he'll eat anyone. I'm very excited.
She poured beer through the deck into the hot tub. She called it a deck shot. It was horrifying but super awesome at the same time.
He's like... An octopus that touches my vagina in all these diff ways at the right times. It's almost unsettling
I got a 5 dollar bill, 1 condom, and no alcohol. I get payed on Thursday. Let's do this shit.
Like, I can't stand that bitch, but i genuinely hope she gets the help she needs
You informed me your place was now a nudist colony and unless I was there to drink schnapps with the cat I had to strip.
Just found an airplane bottle of whiskey and I didn't put it in my coffee. I think I deserve a little recognition this morning.
Randomize
