I am about to get in a knife fight over a corn dog.
were talking about masturbation in my pysc class. He says it's healthy. I'm gonna live forever
dude she has hot friends.. do you want blonde brunette or red head.. maybe asian?
what is this build-a-bear? .. just gimme one thats breathing
The only way I could have failed my exam worse is if there would have been a drug test portion
You were doing downward dog and puking off my deck at the same time.
Can you send me the video of that girl that got arrested last night? I'm gonna try and hit that and I need something to break the ice with.
we've got reservations. ask for the eat a bag of dicks table
She just landed. Popped over for a BJ and left. I'm a fan of layover layovers.
According to FB I fucked in a field 365 days ago.
Remember that time i gave you head on MY birthday and you made me stop so you could watch the rhino part in 300
So glad the long weekend is over so I can bring this bender to a merciful end.
Your mother may get texts again about women putting dog food up their vaginas and asking for it to be licked.
Seriously I am not buying you condoms anymore. You're 22, if you aren't woman enough to buy them yourself then you don't deserve orgasms. Grow some tits.
just like cleaning my room and being more organized in my life. more so just making sure a toaster doesn't end up in my car again for 2 months
What is my life coming to that I have to cross state lines to get laid?
Randomize
