I thidmdmk you'gre a special person
I just masturbated at work. Does that make me a prostitute since i just technically got paid to have sex?
She looks like Robin Williams dressed as a frog.
next time dont tell jokes :) miss bonerkill
windsor, ontario is like a poor man's amsterdam
no, it is just poor
i'm making a list of conversation topics in my blackberry so the ride won't be so awkward
Apparently getting drunk, buying a guitar from your local costco and walking in to an open mic night is not the same as rocking out to guitar hero...
he was like the dessert in the all you can eat man buffet that has become my life.
Just you wait I'll be crying and puking everywhere in no time
I bought him bourbon as a thank you for his apology. What is wrong with me?
I can only only sleep there on nights I orgasm cause he snores so loud and if he leaves me hanging one more time ill probably cut off his dick from lack of sleep and frustration
How about we just have a naked taco night instead?
Look I'm really high right now, and if I were to leave this house, it would be for the sole purpose of getting an ice cream sandwich. So can you please just do it.
Update on my sex life: my calves are sore from masturbating too much. It's a thing. Look it up.
I don't want to just hook up with random dudes. I've had enough bad sex to know that it's not worth hooking up with strangers
It's not?
Randomize
