Just got yelled at by a priest...again.
Full bush! Can't stay! Need ride! Come on bro!
I literally just saw a campus policeman riding a Segway pull over a moving car. you should just give up.
I have to have sex with him again. I feel like I need to train him so no other girl experiences that bad of sex.
apparently it was the return of drunk burrito sex.
Just asked the bartender if I could use the register to see my grades.
she called for a booty call so i sent mike as my stunt double
We just did a shot to "getting laid in the bar bathroom". I love where this thursday is headed
I know it I should, but it's kinda nice. It's smells like unbridled enthusiasm and copious amounts of melt your face off sex.
He sent me a snap chat of his naked torso with cookies over his nipples. Like.... that does not make me want you homeboy.
Ohh I see how it works, eat pussy and I get Reese's pieces.
I just want you to know when I bang him in the back of my car later I'll have pony by ginuwine on repeat
Listen, I've got balls in my face can I call you back
I heard a crunch while giving him head. I looked up and he was eating Cheese Itz. So we made a deal that he'd take a hand job so I could eat them too.
I’m sorry I got high and yelled about the patriarchy.
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