My doctor literally wrote on the script NO SEX
We blazed in her bathtub. All 5 of us. Not easy bro
I invited you and you fucked me in the face with the penis of disappointment and shit.
Dear god how many nuts did u bust in me my vagina feels like a bowl of jello.
And then we were riding the keg in the pool like an 8 second rodeo...naked.
PLAN B IS EXPENSIVE ON A $50 A WEEK BUDGET.
We have to have sex twice when i get back. I miss you sex, and thank god the nhl lockout is over sex. I will happily let you wear your sharks jersey during it and i will wear my ducks jersey, and it will be mad rivalry sex.
I tried to stop that, but then I pulled the leaves out of my panties and went to sleep.
legit question. can i put a condom down our garbage disposal? my rents are coming over in 20
Some guy in the bathroom just took his shirt off and proceeded to tell me the story behind all of his stab wounds. That's what I get for making small talk
I'm over being sad. I'm now onto thinking about all the ways in which he is a total fuckwaste
Drunk sperm are not productive sperm.
The cat hopped on my bed and watched me masturbate naked with a vibrator. I've never felt more sorry in my entire life
This is the fourth guy that I've broken in to gay sex. How the hell do they find me?
Positive reviews on angieslist?
Fursuit judi Dench just stared directly at me for 3 solid minutes telling me that cats arent dogs and i believe her because if i dont cat jason derulo might try to have sex with me
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