Plus apparently whenever one of her friends loses their virginity they get a party with a funfetti cake which I found funny
They are baked and once again have spent the last 45 mins talking about opening up a world wide business called "pickle on a stick"
I'm so covered in bruises. God dammit drunk me. We are a lady.
Steve is gonna hang his bear rug on the wall because he doesn't trust us not to have sex on it...
I just had a dream that I was pulling you around downtown on a sled, from bar to bar. Dear lord if we start that there's no hope for us
The Deck is crawling with Cougars. Sound the irresponsibility alarm and come drink with me on a Tuesday night.
No one suspects that a sweet girl who is excited about her anniversary with her bf just blew her partner at work in a communal area a few hours ago, so its cool.
I honestly think she should have her own reality show called "Lowering the Bar" and it consists of a camera crew following her from Bar to bar hooking up with unsuspecting drunk attractive men.
Last thing I remember is ranting about hating pants. Woke up this morning pants less. Couldn't find them, decided to leave. Driving without pants is surprisingly liberating.
It's cosmic balancing. My vagina is an instrument of karmic retribution.
He got an erection from helping me mobilize my lumbar spine. I love physical therapy school.
I'm glad your nude photos turned out "classy" but you cannot hang them in the living room.
He asked me how many starwars references he could make before i no longer find him attractive.
you would not believe who i just fucked on my lunch break
I'm going to be there later than expected. There was a yo-yo incident...
Randomize
