PS - I'm in bed with an 18 yr old-am I a cougar?
No - puma.
Ask Niel how long his lasts if he plays with it a lot.
he says 15-20 minutes depending on the porn.
no his phone, idiot.
...you put a chicken patty in my toaster last night..
you jizzed all over me and yelled "makeover"
If we were to wake in ur bed together, what are the 3 words you would say to me?
Get out now.
After he convinced me that my friend had died and come back to life, I decided I was having sex with him that night, and that I should lay off the drugs for a while.
I can do it, this is my punishment and I will accept it, plus id like to see the look on peoples faces when I throw up on them
But on the up side she uprooted a whole peony plant from the hotel downtown and said, "I brought you flowers"
I just showered sitting down with a sippy cup of water in there with me. It took 40 minutes. That hungover.
The more I drank he just got hotter and hotter. And then the mustache didn't look too bad
My dry spell starts kindergarten this fall...
They grow up so fast.
I've reached the last of the wine in my cup so now I have to sit up in my bed to get it through the crazy straw
My professor just asked for my number. Not fucking her till after finals though I learned my lesson last time.
poll: am I friendzoned if he just called me brochacha? on one hand, he called me bro, but on the other, he used the a to make it feminine.
MY DINNER LAST NIGHT CONSISTED OF SEMEN AND A PROTEIN SHAKE... MY TRAINER WOULD BE PROUD I DIDN'T HAVE CARBS!
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