think im gonna go get a six pack before class and sit in the back of the room...
The lack of respect you have for your penis baffles me. I'd rather rub my ball sack on public toilet seats than stick my dick in some of those girls.
A simple 'no' would have sufficed
Before you ask, yes. Whatever you're wearing IS too slutty for his mom's funeral.
I'm going to die alone in a sea of empty vodka bottles and cats.
He ended up walking out of his bedroom and told me to look at the nonexistent fire he was holding in his hand. Im upset I didn't take those shrooms.
I found the hair cut I want on the girl in the porno I'm watching. now really sure how to show my stylist.
She told me I made the cut, and to write my name and number on the white board by the door. I was the 7th number down.
Please tell me how I go from a guy with a coke problem to a cop. My own life doesn't even make sense to me anymore
White girls? They're everywhere. In packs. Drunk white girl packs.
I told my mom I'm great in bed. That is quality mother daughter bonding.
Your the only person to come back from spring break with a non std related infection
He wants me to tell you "my boner misses you"
I love that there are toys on the counter. Coffee, tea, wine bottles, gag ball, and handcuffs.
My kitchen gets me.
im single, its not even nine am on Valentine's day and I've already gotten laid. suck it relationships
Not going to make it tonight. Some cougar at the bar just told me she has dibs on my dick.
Randomize
