Someone's got a whale tail
A thong is hangin out?
No, a fatty following them
he also called and said i only cheated on you 8 times but they were all trannies
and someone in the background yelling "one was fat so that counts as one and a half"
We videoed ourselves having sex... I now know why I close my eyes during sex
Because of no shave november, it's no boys december... pay back
I just undressed him with my eyes. And gave him a 10 inch penis. I hope its true.
Can u please come get me. My car keys are gone. Somehow I ended up sleeping in my trunk
We fucked in your water heater closet. Told you we'd try everywhere.
We were on the balcony tossing jello shots to people passing below
When people said no i'd yell "i tried them i promise they aren't roofied!"
Ya I guess if we compared our actions now with our actions 2 years ago. We are definitely in a constant state of shit showness.
Just for future reference, me asking if you're free, followed by a winking face is not my way of suggesting a tandem bike ride.
How much do you charge for your Funyun and beer delivery service?
I really shouldn't be this use to hearing "YOURE THAT GIRL?!?!"
seriously they are like going to hulk burst through. There are perks and downfalls to having big boobs
I just put bronzer on my abs to snapchat nudes. If that's not going hard I don't know what is
I ask him how he's going, like life and stuff, and he responds "20-0 pats"
Randomize
