You're going to have to start masturbating with your left hand. Or with someone's vagina
Dork........ .......... .. . ...... ........... .. . ... ...... .. . .... ..... .. .... ... .......... .... . . ..... Yeah its morse code, no big deal
This row in front of you is like duck, duck, goose - but eating disorder, eating disorder, failed eating disorder
i overslept, had to take a cab to the train station, might puke, bought the wrong flavored vitamin water, and mj's dead. what a terrible world to wake up to.
You asked the dj to play 'who let the dogs out" because it was your birthday. You left the bar and then re-entered to the song
Just opened a bottle with my rape whistle. At least it's finally getting used for something.
I know it's pride week, but your asshole is just never supposed to taste like banana.
How external is "for external use only"?
You have no idea how pumped I am. I literally plan on dying. You're in my will
A drank guy in the ER just sang Trouble to me and when he sang 'Lying on the cold hard ground' he threw himself onto the ground and landed on the wrist he'd just broken. Thirsty Thursday is weird already and it's not even 5.
Remind me to tell you the story of the fuzzy condom
Speaking of dignity, who all saw me....
i wish i could put you in a lil box, and keep you for when i need to be blown
So chicken strips and confidence do not you make you sober.
dude i told her that I loved her...and she said, " go fuck yourself"
Randomize
