I just want to know how you cleaned her puke off the twister mat with no gloves. And didn't throw up
On this egg donor form, it asks "In the past 5 years, have you had sex for drugs or money?" It only gives a yes or no option and no place to explain myself. What do I do?
i don't really know how much tequila is too much
ok, just found out the kid i had random sex with in April was on wheel of fortune so i can really no longer say i regret that night
also. he gave me a foot massage during 69ing when i got a cramp. he's a winner.
My fuck buddy took time out of his date with his girlfriend to text me happy Valentines Day.
I had to explain to my dentist that my tooth was chipped because we designated my mouth as the official way to open beer. I feel like our level of partying is no longer socially acceptable.
She said I looked exactly like my dad. Then she made out with me. Should I be questionable?
you were leaning up against the wall pulling your shirt up asking girls to dance on you. your courage to do that is both admirable and frightening.
The molly dropped while I was taking a shit. Do you have any idea how scary that is?
That does not seem like timing
On the way home there was a guy passed out IN the road on Colfax with his pants around his ankles, completely bare assed. If he was dressed as a speed bump, he succeeded.
He's all enlightened and liberal. My next beefcake will be much more Neanderthal.
I threw up in the shower. I cleaned it all up and there is on mess at all. This hangover has become borderline religous. Powerful and life changing.
Haha I'M GOING TO MISS HIS PENIS SO MUCH. But not his bipolarness.
3.5 bazillion penises. So not that hard to find a new good one
Ugh. My life is a never ending cycle of bad decisions and taquitos.
Randomize
