he wasnt into me til he saw how good i was at ms pacman. wtf why does this always happen? when she kisses pacman it was a little awkward, so i made my move. i went for more than one kind of banana last night!
she said she'd get any tattoo I wanted ... so she's getting a large crossword puzzle as a tramp stamp. I'm the Einstein of doggy style
On a side note I think I burnt my eyebrow when we "teter-totered" into the fire
The girl behind me in psych just tapped me on my shoulder to tell me there was a condom wrapper in my hood.
They both just did a shot, head butted each other, did another shot and then slapped each other in the face. These could be the two guys we've been looking for all our lives
Walmart at night is scary enough without having to run into people you've slept with
ITS A JAGER BOTTLE. NOTHING CAN BE BAD IF ITS JAGER RELATED.
He threw up the X he took like 30min before then when we thought his antics were over... BOOM! He tried to pee out a light he was holding.
She just asked me if I was looser "in the vagina" than her. While gyrating.
Can we please get through at least one night out when you DON'T threaten to have sex with one of my parents?!?!
I just finished packing for spring break, took me 4 minutes. To be fair though I only put my trunks, a pair of underwear, and 50 condoms in my bag.
I'm not even mad. I was just trying to get a boner, you're the one that had to see that
Damn you are the highwater mark of the naked women in my life. Like idk what lined up but yeah.
home. only unpacked the necessities...contact case and beer.
I was asked to be part of a mmf threesome. I think I'd rather stay home, watching Orange is the New Black and cuddle with my cat though
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