Yes, it's true. 4 fingers.
My nephew just came out playing with my moms vibrator.
totally got the gold medal for the best fence jump when the cops came.
Just found a hundred dollar bill on the ground. Hope you're looking to drink tonight
i used baking grease as lip gloss
if my spotter knew I was listening to the Wicked soundtrack on my iPod, I wouldn't even be mad if he dropped the barbell on my throat
i was just skypeing her and i saw the vagisil medicated wipes in the corner of her room. i'll be breaking this off tomorrow
he drove an hour to get eggs with me not even a blow job, just eggs.
Let me start this apology by saying I'm sorry that I bit your penis.
I actually just took 17 pictures of some guy at the gas station that needs to marry me now
My aunt left me alone with the instructions to "get waisted" by the time she returns. I love drunk aunt.
I think once you know a guy's chest measurements the stalking has gone too far..
If I stopped drinking I'd have to take up murdering.
But Keith is doing MDMA for New Years and he's 39.
Keith has a beautiful 20 year old girlfriend, a good job and a cute puppy. We can't all be Keith.
But I want to be Keith.
who knew rolling through the dorm on a scooter in footie pajamas would attract so many guys. he said i'm his soulmate.
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