i blacked out hard core.. it was bad peeeed muh bed
I just saw the girl you left with - Chris Hansen's looking for you
ur plase or mine? lol
well if you don't learn how to spell, you may be at your place and I'll be at mine.
A letter to the campus apologizing for being sucha cunt with a picture of her head on it. All posted around campus.
On the plus side this hangover is the tipping point that finally convinced my lazy ass to get some sunglasses.
You sir are most definitely in. Better get your penis an umbrella as that bad boy is gonna get soakkkkkkeddddd.
Some girl at the bar was showing us her chipped tooth as a pick up line.
Man. Apparently I blacked out between the 4th margarita and my air mattress. Asleep in my jeans at 10pm. Mom outdrank me again.
it's gotten to the point where I just look in my closet, think, "which article of clothing behaves most like a towel?" and then just go with that
Just read the 12 signs you're a horrible roommate post and fucking in your roommate's bed wasn't on the list, so I'm a pretty awesome roommate.
Just broke my no shot rule again.. Made out with a stranger. That's 0 for 3 this month for the record
This text constitutes a formal request for sexual congress under the terms of our Relationship Agreement.
So why are your hands bright blue and have you seen my roommate.
Both questions will answer each other.
Last thing I remember I was riding on a picnic table being hauled around by a lawn mower with an empty case of bud light on my head...
You have my heart. You only share my vagina.
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