We're like a lot better than the average bears
Down for casual relationships, more fun than catholic missionary, bring condoms and don't get attached.
you should just get pregnant. that way you don't need to decide on a career.
i just went through and liked all 1,239 of her pictures instead of writing my english paper. don't tell her, i want her to be surprised
watching hot guy on train scrolling with his blackberry's track ball... o to be that track ball...
Don't worry we did the "promise to get an abortion" handshake
Just realized the guy is in my class. Unless there's another guy that had half his ear bit off at a St. Patty's party
He fell off the roof... he clearly has not been preparing for summer.
is year to celebrate how much I love you, I made a mosaic of your penis with conversation hearts. it's in your mailbox.\n\nHAPPY VALENTINE'S DAY TO YOU
Well, I'm at the grocery store wondering whether I exist or not.
i dont know how he's 22 and thinks emoticons will get him laid. lady boner just died.
I don't know which is worse, the fact that he can say will you fuck me in so many languages or that I'm turned on because of that
He ripped off my pantyhose and all I could think was, "oh no those were clinic-appropriate!" That's what I get for ditching a continuing education meeting to go hook up with my scuba instructor.
BOOTY CALL IN EFFECT, BOOTY CALL IN PROCESS, BOOTY CALL ACCEPTED, AND BOOTY CALL INITIATES FRIDAY NIGHT.
SOMEONE has to puke in the potted plants at an Xmas party. As their boss I felt it should be me.
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