I just wanted to let you know that if you dont tell me to stop texting i will still keep on trying, you matter to me
restraining order is on its way, crazy bitch
I woke up and my panties were thumbtacked to his wall. Out of my reach.
Some girl in the stall next to me just yelled "fuck yes i started my period!" she came out of the stall and we high fived. who am i to judge? i do that every month.
you were on ground yelling about how close the floor was to your face.
After New Year's Eve I will be hibernating my life away. Only wake me up for skiing, schnapps, and sex. In that order.
I want to wear something that says I'm a lady (but I have condoms!)
Sorry, not ignoring you.. We broke open the other piñata left from cinco de mayo and it was filled with condoms, mini booze bottles, and those little party horn things you blow into. You'll forgive me when we're fucking for days with all these free condoms.
Hypothetically how does one go about throwing away a dildo?
I don't know if trying Molly for the first time before my flight was an awesome or aweful idea
We found you wrapped up in a tarp in the garage the next morning, thats how real shit got.
At IHOP. It feels weird and sad that your cleavage isn't here for me to try to toss paper wads into.
2 six inch heels, 3 big sangrias, no broken legs
hell or highwater he WILL get a blowjob in the hammock before the end of summer.
Willing booties have sort of a tractor beam for me.
Got so high i fell asleep kyaking...for 2 hours.
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