yeah, but that could mean anything in Denmark.
i went to a real vip club. the bathroom attendant was wiping down counters after girls wearing gucci did lines of coke on them. where did MY life go wrong
she both took care of me and took advantage of me. it was BEAUTIFUL.
It's official. I am the proud owner of his very own sex tape. Amateur awesome porn or awful delete-me-now porn? Come over help me decide.
I would like to apologize for asking to take advantage of you, wishing you a horny Hanukkah and whatever "abd ethw prnym to mzbe yur penis cna be friends" means.
I have three paper towels stuck up my vagina. This is not a time to be calm.
You always have that cute deer in the headlights look. Thats what made showing you my penis for the first time so disconcerting.
Hardcore start to spring break. Mike is wearing adult diapers because the only stop we are making is for gas.
Hon, I found you crying into a bathrobe in the back of a closet with a broken shoerack.
at work, .. 47 yr old boss was in a fight. 2 BLACK EYES. I may get fired. I cant stop laughing
Don't feel sorry for me. I'm getting Red Lobster and sex tonight. Nothing can bring me too far down.
We're following a guy carrying a door for beer pong at his place..join us when you are deemed sober enough to leave the hospital.
I don’t have the time, patience, or blood alcohol level to deal with her.
You where banging on the wall asking us where we hid the door...you then crawled under the deck thinking you'd be safe. I told you to eat the nachos before the party...I told you.....
Don’t listen to me, I’m walking around wearing nothing but rave bracelets and headphones shouting “yeeeeaaahhhhhh”
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