i mean i'm ok with bufu but if i'm gonna do it it needs to be a mutual agreement, and there are steps that need to be taken. you don't just go OOPS we're doing it now
I just saw a midget ride by on a scooter...wearing a bowtie and a helmet. My life is complete.
i just uploaded three hundred pictures and you had your shirt off in two hundred and ninety of them
the remaining ten - you weren't in
he started fingering my stomach rolls instead of my vag... am i really that fat?
he emptied an entire bag of goldfish onto the bed and rolled around yelling the theme to jaws trying to eat them
I can't wait to find out the true size of his penis! Please maintain enough sobriety for an accurate report.
In case you were wondering...putting everclear into a humidifier DOES get you really really drunk.
I am actually insulted by the long string of ugly, fat girls he hooked up with after me.
Woke up in an unfamiliar pair of underwear, running shoes but no socks, and a cowboy hat. Thank you crown royal
They make twin pack pregnancy tests for girls like us
You have no idea I looked like the porno version of Laura Ingalls Wilder
That was a very uncomfortable conversation to have without pants on. But his mom was pretty cool about it.
My lighter is stuck in my beard.
I don't know if I'm more excited about sex or that I have an excuse to smoke a cigarette
i just remembered i drunk watched the brave little toaster last night
Randomize
