now i know why they say having sex with her is the equivalent to licking a pay phone
i have a strong urge to join the asians in the park doing tai chi. I think im still high .
You flung your panties at that guy you liked with an accuracy that I have never seen before.
so after he got his stomach pumped, he asked for a smoking room.
The look your mother gives you when she sees you masterbating on web cam is unlike any I've seen before, but this is a case where, I would say, ignorance is bliss.
There were so few words spoken that I'm not sure if it was make-up or break-up sex.
Do you think that we can get a group discount on liver transplants? We'll be like kids again!
she texted me out of nowhere. and I wanted to get drunk. like I didn't even have her new number until 6 hours ago and bam we were rolling around drinking cotton candy vodka from the bottle she had stuffed in a boot
True freedom is running around a sex club in former power plant in Berlin wearing a boots, a jock
He literally just peed in a trash can in our room. It didn't even have a bag in it
When you make me feel sane and well-adjusted, it is time to reevaluate your night out habits. Just sayin'.
As your friend, who loves and cares for you, I have to be honest. I am judging you so VERY hard right now. Sorry.
Already doing pt exercises by picking my margarita up off the night stand. Fuck yeah.
would it be awkward if i bring my husband?
only if i fuck you in the bathroom while he's paying the check
You walked into the frat house and screamed "whose down to fuck" i think they were more intimidated than anything
Randomize