Just got head while drinking hot cocoa and eating cookies. Never in my life have I felt more like santa claus
That reminds me...we need to get swords
New swimming pool is best sex toy ever. We are pioneering the doggie-style paddle.
the problem with having sex for lunch when its 98 degrees outside is that I can't tell if its sweat or semen running down my leg as I walk back in the office
I like my landing strip. Makes me feel sophisticated.
What you did last night can never be called sophisticated. I don't care how you trim your pubes.
if you are still a virgin by winter break we are throwing an aztec themed sacrifice the virgin party
can't decide if i look like a hooker or a missing member of Poison today
I guess I've just seen a lot of penises since then
He has started theming his dick pics. I have one he sent his duck has a sombrero on. Another a Barbie is riding it.
I mean, I would have, but I couldn't come up with a logical reason to bring up oral sex during an orientation.
But lunch with my dad really just means an hour and a half of him telling me how he's disappointed and how he knows I'm on drugs
Our nipples touched last night. It was tender.
All I want is some guy to eat me out while I work on grad school things then go on his way
Not my fault the fence refused to just break when I ran into it.
I let a 30 year old guitar player that works at a call center go down on me in his backseat last night
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