mrs. f**** your sons in jail, if you can help with bail please respond, if not please dont tell him i told you.
so...dinner was kid's cuisine and a bottle of wine. i think they go well together.
If your still trying to figure out the moment I stopped caring; it was the point in which you said "I really wasn't sure whose baby it was"
You're so easy to please, it's adorable. Like an alcoholic puppy.
i gave her road head last night, needless to say it wasn't the same and i bit a chunk of the inside of my cheek off.
Springtime is officially here. I just used pool water to fill up the bong
My mom just asked me if I was gay in front of my gf
His penis without viagra is what breaks my heart.
I mean I'm screaming I love the gays in the middle of Bart so yeah
If my eyeballs could make a sound to describe how they feel they would just say uhhhhhhhhggggggghhhhhh.
If you bring home Chipotle tonight I'll give you an epic bj...ball play and all #datenight
She has a bong hits for Jesus shirt. Of course I'm going to like her.
You're either getting fucked or a coupon to Friendly's. I haven't decided yet.
I just told 2 of my vibrators "I love you." I seriously need some dick.
U dont jog and buy condoms n bulk
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