We walked 2 miles, legit 2 miles, and purchased 7 half gallons. One for each of us. Intense
no, its his 'welcome back from rehab' party.
If you made a robot out of pillows would he be nice? It's hard to imagine a mean pillow robot. And who came up with the idea of shaving their legs?
no, I didn't make it. Instead, i watched VH1 for... 13 hours? I use the question mark because I was using Flavor Flav's clocks to tell time after the first 3 hours.
brittany murphy hurts far more than michael jackson, patrick swayze, etc because i never masturbated to any of those other people
My body isn't even mad at me...just disappointed
What's a "vodkaffle"?
It's where she puts vodka in the waffle mix.
Sometimes you gotta take the crosseyed stripper. fuck it
Decided in my tanked state last night purchase 2 weeks worth of xanax, so I can guess my way thru this week and finals. Soberly, I decided it would be a great way to test my knowledge of finance.
your body is your temple. do you really want a bunch of dicks in your temple?
a victory without nudity is not really a victory
I'm to childless and to single to be asking myself why I'm so sticky
listen. i haven't sucked a dick in well over three years but i believe in myself.
you asked if you could borrow my vagina for the night
I think I deserve an award for the breakup text I sent him. Like a pulitzer prize or a donut or something.
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