On a side note I can sing drakes “best I ever had” so good you’d think I was on degrassi.
You have to stop making references to your extense knowledge of 13 year old girl television programming for me to believe you aren’t homo. The Bravo line-up was one thing, but seriously
craigslist faux pas number 857, just got head in a disability bus.
dude i need to stop getting high. i cant afford to eat like this...
i kinda regret how quickly i gave it up to him, but i just wanted the regular fucking to begin soon. ah we made good memories.
I just woke up entirely naked on top of a pile of some guy's laundry on his bedroom floor.
DR UNK TOWN USA
TEAM USA GO AMERICA
We hooked up and then we watched game of thrones while he fed me chocolate. I don't see how our benafriendship is a bad thing.
My sister texted me to say she just found a corn on the cob in her purse from last night. You need to party with us more.
I think I used my NERF gun during sexual roleplay. Need to re-evaluate my life choices.
best eviction party ever.
it wasn't an eviction party you asshole, you just happened to get yourself evicted during the party.
Her vagina is like the upper echelon of Scientology and I don't have enough money to get in
I woke up with a black eye and a buttplug...not sure I really want to know what happened.
you never know when your going to find a surprise from me in your bed...it keeps you on your toes.
Well I thought I saw everything and then I saw Christmas themed poop bags at Petco.
They are in the bedroom next door. We might have a threesome idk. Jesus take the wheel.
GO. DO.
I am Jesus and I am taking the wheel.
Randomize
