If it were my dying wish, would you come over 2nite 2 save me?:):):) wana come anyways?
At least make sure they are 18
Why
He belongs with you like a mcdonalds playground belongs in Chernobyl
they told me her nickname is "wizard sleeve"
pick me up NOW
I tried to explain to him that we just wanted a stereotypical black friend to be in our group. He didn't take it too well... Never take me to the bar again.
The question of "Will I eat a piece of curried chicken off the floor?" has been answered tonight.
He asked the clerk if they sell a penis-shaped brander.
The neighborhood kids rang the doorbell in the middle of my first bong rip to ask if they could use my trampoline for the thirtieth time today...I opened the door and pretended to puke up a shitload of smoke, I have never seen a more terrified group of children
there is vodka in my soul right now. The vapor is coming out my nose.
I've blown him while he hit my bong, I've blown him while he played video games and now I'm looking for a new challenge. Don't even try suggesting a blumpkin.
There are so many things that would come back to haunt me if I ran for President someday.
like that video of you mad stoned vomiting in the bdubs parking lot after going to a pizza buffet screaming how you needed to make room for froyo
Wat
the only thing you said was do the helicopter dick
I'm gonna eat more dunkaroos to cope with what's in my vagina.
I didn't know where you were for like 15 minutes and then I went in the bathroom splashing water on the mirror and throwing hand towels around saying that you were "redecorating"
Why do all the Father's Day cards talk about what a great dad they are? Why can't there be one that says something like "Thanks for sticking it to mom and making me possible, your sperm was appreciated."
Randomize