are you so shy because you have an std?
For the whole 7 seconds I lasted, I was in heaven.
and when he finished he started shouting "swim boys SWIM"
This guy just came in and told me how he bought a clock for his cat so his cat can know when he's coming home...
I just criticized a porno's use of editing. Film school is ruining me.
I just had a 30 minute fake cell phone conversation with myself just to avoid hooking up with the drunk guy next to me. its like an art form.
I'll report later on the progress of the mountain orgy
No kidding. I just keep looking at that 'under 21 until 11/21/2011' on my id and whispering "soon enough"
Dude you made a rodeo shot in beer pong won the game then got in the hot tub poured beer all over the side and screamed "hot tub time machine!"...
This hangover makes more sense now
After a crazy night, morning sex is just trying to find a position where you can thrust without getting seasick.
Just for once I'd like my first interaction with a new GP to not be an obvious sex injury.
I swear I was in Legend of Zelda Twilight Princess and American Ninja Warrior at the same time. I'm never getting high while rock climbing again.
Hypothetically, I throw a party and my ex-boyfriend and my current fuck buddy are in the same house... what should I do?
How many beds are in the house? Hypothetically...
He came into my room last night and started peeing underneath my desk, I told him the bathroom was the next door over.
There's a big ass bed, hella ecstasy, and I can guarantee you'll regret every second that you remember.
Randomize
