Maybe she gives good head
A girl who still calls a dick a "wiener"cannot possibly give good head
This is why you don't make out with cougars at a bar... I got a linkedin request from her, wtf?
You did not just nickname me "Nipples".
how in the hell can u get pulled over when ur car is parked.
Just woke up. My philosophy paper is a play, and my paper for musical theater is about physics. That's some dank shit you sold me
The guy is drinking 5 bottles of beer in a juice pitcher. Fucking amazing.
I feel awful
Physically or morally
Physically. The only immoral thing I did was steal money from strippers while they gave me lapdances.
Now I'm at the gym and I never want to leave. It's a combo of adderall and endorphins and I don't want it to go away
New low: just got woken up by my 9 year old cousin throwing an empty at me and telling me to get my life together.
He professed his love for me while I danced on a picnic table with a bottle of Absolut. I said thank you and walked away.
I cannot even describe to you the most amazing ass I have ever had the pleasure of seeing walk up the stairs in front of me just now.
He walked in wearing nothing but a WWF belt and yelled "THE CHAMP... IS... HEEERE!!!"
Can you hurry up? Jamie just challenged my ex boyfriend to a duel and someone honest to God handed her a sword?
She didn't have her own?
He invites me over for to adderall and chill. Academic Tuesday
duddde i wasn't even home last night and someone elses clothes are on my floor and there glow sticks everywhere?!
Randomize
