Don't interrupt me, I have a limited time to be high and thus be remarkably good at Pac Man
Also, never say you're cool with a threesome if they ask. That shit's a trap.
my left tit made it into the crop job on your profile pic, I knew it was good for other things
Safe to say I relapsed into my old chatroulette drunk flashing days.
He woke up in a dragon costume, covered in bong water. That was a party we will regret missing.
Just stuck all that extra cocaine money we made in a savings account...like a responsible adult..
That moment half way through a run when you realize you have to take a giant shit. I was racing against my bowels that last mile. Now my sweat is suctioning my ass to this toilet seat. Enjoy that NSA.
i just googled coccaine effects on sexual performance..maybe im dating the wrong guy
making my breakfast out of the pot brownies we made last night. Safe to say it's time to go grocery shopping.
He tried to get me to go back to his place on the condition that he has 6 cats. I was very tempted but I said no. Hoping to go see the cats tomorrow
Did you ever think you lost your bong and then you find it in the weirdest place? I mean, who leaves their bong in the shower?
Well, he was my lawyer and now we get drunk and hook up.
That explains the way he looks at you.
the night literally screamed "cock and ball torture"
YALL MOTHERFUCKERS WANNA WATCH HEAVY METAL AND SMOKE WEED AND PLAY POOL AND DRINK BEER AND SMOKE WEED
he was really really nice, and I did coke off of his dong that night too
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