People are allowed to visit it's just they can't be from Germany and have to wear masks.
Last night he was fingering me with one hand to his ear, calling himself 'dj clittles'
Thats what happens when go home with guys that wear shutter shades to the bar..
She came to work with 6 additional layers of make-up, playing every Nickelback song about explicit teen sex, and with a dozen twinkies she bet she could finish without chewing any. I'm investing in a rape whistle.
Grab the Coors Light. Its time to get NASCAR drunk
I learned an important lesson last night: Jameson giveth, but Jameson also taketh away.
Cruelly.
high as fuck. watching parent trap with my mom. keep missing my mouth.
You are a piece of meat with a side of awesome to me.
Nick is about to bring home a woman who is 39, a mother, and, by all accounts, FUCKING HOMELESS. Will update as details become available.
You would only karaoke to Spanish songs, but sang with the accent of the french candle stick in beauty and the beast.
Holy shit, I wanna ride him into the horizon.
My cat is staring at me while I drink my wine on the bathroom floor in the morning instead of attending class. Sorry mom and dad. Sorry cat.
YOU BROUGHT HANDCUFFS TO THE WHITE ELEPHANT EXCHANGE AND DIDN'T TELL ME???
So here's a tip: don't give a blowjob the same morning you're going to the dentist. Cuz they will think you have "mouth trauma."
Does it get any better than dating a guy with a vasectomy? The answer is NO. No it does not
Tell him to put up or shut up. Can't be dangling dick in front of ho's without delivering.
It's just disrespectful
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