Do the low cut shirt test. If he stares at your tits even in front of your brother, he's down.
I woke up naked in my own vomit. Not even in my bed. No one is happy.
Rode a jet ski for the first time three days after I lost my virginity. Hell of a week for my vagina.
Seeing a catheter being inserted into a penis severely diminished my sex life
Softest bathroom rug I've slept on in my life, there have been many
Yours weakened by children. Mine weakened by a forearm sized cock for 8 years.
Serious question: when you had my right nipple in your mouth, did my nipple ring have both of the balls on it, or was it missing one. Current situation: missing one.
The only thing that got rode last night was the shit face train. I brought him home to see wht all the hype was about and he just started crying and puking in my bathroom.
His cat kept scratching my feet while we were having sex. There's only room for one pussy around here. It also concerns me that he owns a cat.
There's that certain point at night when you start saying things like s'mores should be used in foreign relations. I reached it.
I almost tased myself
I dont think you should own that device.
It's an awesome device. I love this device.
What's clit gel and why is it in my wallet.
my liver is dry heaving
We got cut off at the bar, but it's okay because I tactically rolled behind the bar and grabbed a bottle of whiskey. Meet me in the back booth when you're done puking in the bathroom. This is about to get real slutty.
He’s older
Like “has a job and pays his bills” older or “still watches porn on DVD because he can’t figure out the Internet” older?
Randomize
