I could write a book called "things that come out of my vagina"
totally got the gold medal for the best fence jump when the cops came.
You're the only chick there. That's not an orgy, that's called a gang bang...
Call me pathetic, but saying "tits for ireland" is working out really well on chatroulette today.
i feel as uncomfortable as your camel toe looks.
Have introduced beer-pong to my work's Tuesday lunches.
Shes been standing with her arms crossed in front of the mirror for 45 minutes...she told me she's "getting sober"
the guy in the stall next to me, came in, farted, laughed, and proceeded to give himself some sort of hillbilly pep talk that included the phrase "big pussy".
She's locked herself in the bathroom with a tub of icecream and she's watching my little pony on her phone. We know it cause she sings with them.
If sitting in the car passing a flask back and forth because the bar we go to is having some power issues on Christmas eve isn't Christmas spirit, then I don't know is.
I like you as a friend, but I'm in love with your dick.
We always end up having sex in random places after class. I need to stop letting this dude borrow my pens.
So I deleted all the text from my phone, was looking for my mom's coffee order and show the coffee guy the pic of me eating pussy.
You couldn't even walk but you came into the kitchen with the funnel and begged me to put beer in it
Well that's disappointing. I guess I'll give a lesson on dick-breaking another time then
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