I think that we as people have rights and that we should at the very least be warned before being subjected to Fergie
she was talking to me but i could help but stare at the extremely long hairs on her boobs. then she says, "your looking at the hair on my boobs aren't you"
She celebrated a negative pregnancy test by going out to Quizno's. I really don't understand her at all.
He spent most of his night trying to convince people that he had changed and was no longer a sleazebag...he had his nut hanging out of his pants about an hour later.
now that we've slept with the entire soccer team i think its time to expand the horizon.
A guy dressed like Jesus just gave me a mini keg. Prayers really do come true.
i admit it was a weird experience, but why regret what once made you cum
Had to go to the urgent for a physical and I gave them my fake. Nurse was a sport though
I think I've just evolved into some kind of vodka fueled monster
especially when i'm drunk. his dick might as well be made of cotton candy.
2016 was supposed to be my year of being a ho, but I guess 2017 might be too.
and please, if you feel the urge to call me crying tomorrow night, do so. i will be home bored and sober.
My whole life is a joke
Yeah. I’m starting to see why you drink so much.
Why is the floor coated in a 2 inch blanket of popcorn??
sorry about your sharpie. alex wanted to shave the left side of his body so he had me draw a line over him with a ruler
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