i think beer pong is the only time ive ever found a use for geometry
My bracket is officially just a list of teams that lost.
her name was charlotte except you kept calling her chatroulette and yelling at her to show you her boobs
Miss Michigan hasn't even been Miss USA for 24hrs and already stripper pole pics are surfacing. Classy.
Who was that couple sleeping in your bed with us last night?
She scratched my sunburn during sex. I didn't know whether to cry or cum
They only knew me as the lesbian that passed out in a bathtub. That's not what you call friendship.
I am convinced that after two dates and a few adult sleepovers that he still doesn't know my name.
SORRY BITCH CAN'T, TAKING SHOTS TO WHITNEY HOUSTON.
Done deal I'm dying it right at this moment. I'll need a red Speedo and a half shirt that is extremely tight. Like nipple tight.
Just discovered evidence of drunken eBay bid. Drunk Mike did pretty good -- I'm getting a new sleeping bag.
Dude respond to my evite. You're either coming to the orgy or not.
P.s. There are few things I love more than brand new mascara and you are one of them.
I brought an already opened bag of trail mix from home to snack on today. Some motherfucker ate all the m&ms out of it. I hate my roommates
Where do you think black out memories go?
Into the dark abysmal abyss of the deepest, darkest part of your mind. It's obviously the bodies natural defense to protect you from witnessing the shit you do while actually blacked out.
Randomize