Now that the fun of having an iPhone has worn off I find that using screen as a coke tray is by far my favorite app
Did you know the Dallas Cowboy cheerleaders have an exercise show ON Demand? Yeah, I had a lonely night
Just made a pepperoni sandwich with cheese, mayo, and pickles. Poverty is like pot, without the happy feeling.
Just tried my new showerhead. Sex with Brian will never be the same.
The handjob she gave me was better than the best blowjob I've ever gotten.. Just imagine the possibilities.
Yeah I'm gunna date him. I figure its regular sex and maybe feelings will come in time...it worked for arranged marriages...
I think it may of been me pulling down my pants is why she walked away.
Dude just texted me asking if I could drive 45 mins for a quickie dude use your hand
I have a high opinion of you, you smash bitches. Respect.
Some girl came up to us crying that she lost her phone and you said "if it's meant to be, let it be"
Just got to Evans to buy weed. His mom showed up unannounced. Now the three of us are chillen. Super.
At 38 I had to open a Snapchat account to communicate with my 21 yr bf. where is my life going.
Tonight I researched being a phone sex operator and teaching English at a French school in Africa. I think my future lacks direction
I woke up using a beer can as a pillow. successful party?
So she was amazing, that's what. Idk if it was the blow or the blowjob, but both my heads are still tingling.
Randomize
