This girl is very crazy
She's one of those compassionate ppl
So everything I said on this seemingly endless date offended her
I'm towing my little brother down the road on a sixty year old tractor, we're taking up the whole highway, and no one cares. I love South Dakota.
I just projectile vomited in a Methodist church parking lot. If Jesus didn't love me before he sure as hell doesn't now.
in the car goin home for fam dinner and he is silent... i think he realized how big of a whore his little sister is
i was so drunk i stopped mid-blowjob to make sure he i was with my boyfriend and not some random. twice.
He had the Transformers symbol tattooed to his chest. We had to do it doggy style so I could laugh into my pillow instead of his face.
i mean he wasn't bad looking, but i wouldn't have slept with my professor if i knew everyone would get an A
Next time we go to the river, we nominate you to flash people for free booze. Your tits are the biggest.
hey, this is the drunk ass freshman from last night. thanks alot for helping me out last night, i'd probably be on some lawn if it wasn't for you guys! and my mom says thanks for talking to her
Lets just make a point system, like if we have sex add a point, if they leave after take away a point, if they stay all fucking day take away a point
Ive never seen one person more proud of themselves of peeing in public and getting away with it.
My boyfriend told me that I said I wanted to "feast on her vagina"... Glad I don't remember.
Well. We had sex and then watched 6 episodes of Dateline NBC together; only breaking the silence to make disapproving noises at shotty police work. So basically yea I'm gonna marry him.
the insurance claim form from last night says foreign object removal from genitourinary tract so as far as the insurance company knows, it could have been a gerbil
I just described cereal to my mother as "acoustic breakfast soup".
who is this
Randomize
