thought so. i woke up and he was playing with my eyeliner. I MAKE GREAT CHOICES.
dude you apologized to her after she called you stupid. you were like "no i'm sorry, you shouldn't have to be around stupid people, it's my fault"
I just remembered we said the Lord's Prayer before we went out last night.
Just crossed the line with my beat friends girl twinsie. Didn't realize tillz afta how much the look alike and an thougholy creeped out. Thanks ciroc
Hannah Montana > iCarly
I'm disregarding that text and your testicles entirely
I've realized that you're the only friend i can rely on to drink with me any given day. i thank you for that.
I expect to be treated like a lady. Even If your sticking it in my ass.
at what point last night did we decide it was okay to let me hitch hike to another bar?
got high to the hills theme song. FEEL THE RAIN ON YOUR SKIN. no regrets.
Trust me at the end of the night there will be queso smothered places you didn't think it could be smothered
Delivery driver perk #327: I just paid for part of the security deposit on my new place in pizza. This oughta be a fun renting experience.
It's a gay bachelor party, it's not like dignity is to be expected
They're either celebrating their tax money or trying to kill each other.
My joke about liking my coffee like I like my men IS ABOUT TO COME TRUE.
Your the only girl I know that carries a $1100 purse with tater tots inside
Randomize