Do I give off a "I have a sex tape" vibe???
I wish I still had pics from the prostitute I paid/dated
I already wrote the apology to my liver. He knows whats up
I'm also 3/4 on the frats. Its like my goal of traveling to all 7 continents, but different somehow and a lot less morally sound.
The cop was more concerned with the syringes on the dash board than looking for the source of the smoke. Thank god for diabetes!
I figured you left because I was a shit show. Were you still there when I got locked in the bathroom and didn't know where I was? If not, that could have been a dream. I'm still not sure.
he called us the olsen twins. we also rapped ignition much to his dismay.
Hate is such a strong word! I prefer to think that you strongly dislike me due to the honesty I show towards your routine shortcomings of success in life.
College has taught me that the "best idea" is rarely the fun one.
This is true but you can't really get fired from college
It's like if a cloud had tits and you laid on them.
He pissed on a police station. Then expected to not be arrested. Sounds accurate.
How much more is Amanda Bynes going to rip out our hearts?!?!?
lets do drugs on my lunch break tomorrow
I don't know why I do this to myself his dick is a constant source of disappointment.
guess who got crunk and thought it would be a good idea to give herself a pixie cut?
THOUGHT
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