He said he's was gunna give me some pain meds. I'm not sure what they are but I just gave him a thumbs up
You two kept repeating the same thing over and over. It was like looking after retarded pull-string dolls.
You said eat breakfast. So i poured Baileys on top of m&m's. It taste just like like cereal I swear.
My mom and dad are smoking a joint while lecturing me on what to bring and how to act in Europe. I'll finish this glass of wine and head over.
Things I just found under my covers: protein bar, string cheese, vibrator.
I don't like getting sloppy drunk but I don't like getting just half drunk either, I'm way too responsible if my blood alcohol level is below 0.2
I woke up and he was just feeling up my stomach. I felt like buddha and he was rubbing my belly for good luck. never again.
I'm proud of you, you were pretty classy last night, you didn't puke AND you didn't take off your shirt, except for those two times in the corner.
That's what every 12 year old basketball team needs; a drunk and hungover lady eating KD whilst cheering them on. Highlight of their lives.
He used one of his curtains as a leash and hand restraints. He wins the creative sex challenge hands down.
Killing two birds with one stone tonight: mastrabation meditation. Win win.
too bad burritos don't cuddle back
Allow me to explain. Triple D is a surprise. It's like if you're expecting to fight one person, then you get ambushed by more. Except it's a good ambush, because it's boobs, not death.
My mother expressed her concerns about my drinking via a facebook message.
thank you for being so understanding of my weak stomach and poor self-control
Randomize
