he only lasted 2 minutes. he said it was because i was so pretty. i'm not sure what to feel right now.
we were like drunken butterflies among sober caterpillars,
Also, I imagined that his bacne was bubblewrap and that made it much more tolerable
She gives the worst handjobs, it was like raw meat on a cheese grater
she's traveling up the coast with her camera and a stash of pot cookies eating food from different campuses. said she slept in a closet 2 states away last nite... of course I'm interested
rolling absolute tits, turn on the red lights for when i get home.
What not to say at an interview: i can wrap the shit out of some food.
6 beers, 3 orange crushes, & half a fire ball later & you get my alter ego.
Dude, I puked in the stall for God knows how long. Halfway through, a kid sits down in the stall next to me and starts jacking off, i heard the porn on his phone and everything. so FYI, the middle stall is where good nights go to die
Just go read my twitter... There's a play by play. It starts with a penis pump
high moment I think I just reached personal nirvana
And, omg, my eyelids are on fire. I think the internet let me down. :(
I cant believe you made me read bad furry sexts
Just don’t be like me and break up between Christmas and NYE and then get blackout on NYE and puke in your undies.
My law teacher drew an elephant on the board in class. I was so high that I laughed for 5 minutes straight. Nobody else laughed and everyone stared. 130 people knew I was high.
Randomize
