Have u ever been so drunk that pissing urself felt like a better idea than walking to the bathroom? I entered those waters last night
Lady GaGa only went backwards in convincing me she's not a man at the VMAs.
On this egg donor form, it asks "In the past 5 years, have you had sex for drugs or money?" It only gives a yes or no option and no place to explain myself. What do I do?
what is the aproppriate waiting time between having sex and playing super Mario brothers
6 min
the elusive kegmastree, who's mystery is only exceeded by it's power
IDK who she called, but some guy came into the party, flying drop kicked Joe said never again. She has to invite him around again.
Oh they knew you from a bachelorette party! You were the pole?
Ohhh shit yeah that was me. Fuck. I hate myself when I do that.
Now you know for the next time you go in the basement to wear a helmet
other than the jail part I had a really good time with you
When / where did the additional couches appear?
Additional?
James brought one with him when he showed up. Theres still 2 outside and according to facebook, at least one more burned up.
I feel like we should apologize to the light saber. We were REALLY inappropriate with it last night.
I ACCIDENTALLY HOOKED UP WITH A GUY WHO HAS A NICHOLAS CAGE POSTER ABOVE HIS BED I CANT HANDLE LIFE.
The universe is either telling you 1. you make terrible decisions or 2. its time to let go of your hatred of Cage.
I also made him write a nonfiction romance novel about what happened and to give it to me when the time was right
HAMMERED.. I made a peanut butter and jelly sandwich with toilet paper instead of bread...
I would throw a dart into the Olympic ceremony and fuck whoever it hit
Randomize
