He tried. I said no. He said, "It's ok if I do this?" and proceeded to jerk himself off. Oh, the French.
its always fun the next morning to look around the room and see where all the clothing landed.
Now he's talking about how he's writing in a journal because he doesn't remember "his thought patterns when he was in elementary and that's distressing". I'm walking home. Fuck this.
Hey, don't feel sorry for me, the two girls in front of me just ordered 18 dollars worth of taco bell. Life could be worse.
so this was truly a case of the blacked out leading the blacked out.
Do you think flip cup during wine tasting is a bad idea? They're perfect flipping cups...
she has a picture of her daughter riding a giant rooster.. of course i want to make obscene cock jokes
I'm hoping that banging a 24 year old 3 times cancels out banging that freshman on Wednesday
I'm at about main and main street
Guess I'll put him on my to-do list too. But closer to the bottom since we dated before. That's almost unethical.
Speaking of fellatio on fictional characters, the Stay Puft Marshmallow Man would be a delicious blowjob.
Calling a preemptive no homo on tonight's activities
if anyone asks you the platypus in my bathtub is a gift...thats all anyone needs to know
just had an allergic reaction to my dildo. My life is ruined.
He really is. Owns his own house and has more than one towel!
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