D3 body, D1 cock
Strawberries are so good its weird that food is growable
I'm home alone watching The Hills seasons, eating pickles and drinking straight rye. I just googled "how to make friends". Probably not the most pro-active solution. Help.
don't worry, i already broke the ice when i told the story about how i super glued a picture of big bird to my vag.
So can we just skip dinner and I'll just pay you for a blowjob?
Don't tempt me, I need beer money.
We learned a valuable lesson from last night. You can, in fact, order bacon on a Big Mac.
Lucky for you, I found your phone.....Not so lucky for you, it was in the bottom of your vomit-filled trashcan.
i made it my goal to pee in the sink of every apartment we went to last night. i didnt use the toilet once
Chris threw beer can at guy. Guy ended up being a fighter. Chris got his eye socket broke. Fighter got hand re-broke. Chris is passed out. Fighter is in kellys bed. everybody won last night. I think.
On a scale of 1 to 3, with 1 being the smallest and 3 being the largest, what size nipple pasty do you think I am?
I'm currently eating a turkey dinner, listening to xplosive by dr. Dre, and drinking rum. Hispanic christmas dinners are the best.
Maybe it's because I walked straight up to that shelf of vodka with a look of determination that said "I mean business".
I usually have to have a cart! If that doesn't say "I mean business" then I don't know what does
Sure go ahead and start this 'business' with him...just don't come crying to me when you have to fake your own death in two years
You've lost booty call privileges between the hours of 10pm and 8am.
And what in gods fuck were you drinking. It tasted like windex with a mixture of juce
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