you alive?
ya, the episode of maury where people are afraid of things are on, i had to keep livin
im laying here in the parking lot drinking a warm coke, prob still drunk, feeling like i need to apologize to everyone i know
she kept calling me pablo. i just went with it.
his mom walked in, looked at me, sighed n nsaid 'when are u gonna learn' n walked out
Its a bummer that corporate america doesn't believe in $2 u call its on a Sunday night
we are still finding bottels filled with his pee. tom almost drank the one in the frig
It was like the Alcoholic Olympics...double fisting fifths with eight 40s in my backpack...running from the cops in stilettos. I will have bitchin' hamstrings come Monday.
we got kicked out of McDonald's because you kept screaming THAT SHIT CRAY at the woman in front of us because she ordered a fish filet.
...that shit cray.
I feel like we have both made good decisions regarding our vaginas lately
I will turn myself into a beacon of get at me bro
This is my college life. Rolling at 4PM on a Wednesday to skrillex in the parking lot of a mexican restaurant.
You were out of control then you fell asleep on his lap for 30 min and woke up civil. Way to powernap to sobriety!
Just rode a bull topless for a free bar tap for a month
Apparently walking into a national conference and proclaiming "i'm here to fuck shit up" is frowned upon.
Who knew?
you were trying to drink the laundry detergent and yelling blue drankkkkk
Randomize
