a/c is broke at work...just took my panties off at my desk and the janitor saw it...might have a date for later. let you know
girls mom is dying from cancer and she msgs me for a booty call. I guess people cope with their situations differently.
you have to give me like a days notice for these kinds of things, you cant just call at 9 am and expect me to be sober
I'm pretty sure he's lost all respect for me. it probably happened somewhere around the time i had officially slept with every single one of his friends..
Ok see being that I'm not present or participating your vague texts "neeeeed that" and "vagina" leave a lot to question.
He thought I was flirting with him but really I just needed someone to hold me up.
God that barista is texting me bout his life like i care i mean dude just hook me up with free coffee thats why i gave you my number
Like I couldn't describe it to you but if they did a lineup of penises i'd be able to pick it out.
After a certain point, you just want to make it work. Prove to yourself that you're smarter than the vibrator.
If graduating leads me to stop getting naked at inappropriate times in public places I'm going to be pissed
He looks like a fat version of lurch from the adams family and smells like fritos. This is not the caliber man I want pleasuring himself to the thought of me!
Woke up to a note written on my hand that read "just because he kisses you, doesn't mean you have to sleep with him"
next time, write it on your vagina so its more effective.
You've lost booty call privileges between the hours of 10pm and 8am.
Apparently she hired a private investigator when he took out a restraining order on her. So the answer is no, I didn't hit it.
Step one: We finally agreed on an au pair that we both wanna fuck.
Randomize
