ive come to realize my hair is a lot like my vagina. i put a bunch of shit in it with no result
I hope you fall in a pool of honey in an immensely populated region of bears.
my Prof for my bio lab has his lab coat collar popped. it's 8 am and im too hungover for this guy
security doesn't like it when we pee on cars. or maybe just not theirs?
I paid your cover too so you're on the list as tits mcgee. You're welcome :D
So I had a crappy evening so the fat girl in me says eat and cry and watch something sad. The cool girl in me says don't eat go run. So I'm watching family guy and doing crunches w a pickle in my mouth
Gross
AN ACTUAL PICKLE
PLEASE. I won't throw up on the floor this time. Or fuck in the bathroom. Or dance on the pool table. So PLEASE.
hey dude, just got with the girl in H4. so mark H off the apartment list
haha we are half through our lease and already checked off 17 letters
His flight is delayed. Mother Nature is delaying me from sex.
Wow two curved penises in one weekend. I feel like this may be good luck. Like finding a four leaf clover
I just ate a handful of salt
I thought this was a good idea
Last time I "ran into him" I ended up with the clap and had to explain why the ladder was missing from the garage.
I have 35 pounds of pennies. Need any?
I'm not gonna be naked if your not here. Thats like a waste of nakedness
If it's any consolation she turned out to be has a collection of clown dolls she talks to crazy. And the cops knew why I was calling when she key locked the door from inside.
Randomize
