Charged a drink to your name last night. Thanks for the whiskey
I definitely just put my boxers on backwards.
haha now u have to piss out ur bum
Are you okay?
Don't worry. Self-respect preserved. My speech was Grey's quality... I made him cry.
Just called my mom. She definitely saw all those fb statuses so thanks for that.
Haha did she know what fisting meant?
Yeah. Which is upsetting in itself
You scratched my dick last night. It deserves an apology and I fell that actions speak louder than words when it comes to apologies like this.
Tranny group. Dance off. Horse hair and dicks swinging. I. Cant. Unsee. This.
ALso, saw an adorable man walking an adorable dog with his adorable kid.
And yes, that last sentence is biased because my ovaries started screaming
If you've ever wanted to get filthy in a Catholic church before 2 on a Wednesday, I might be your guy.
All of the hungover. I've changed not showered but can't quite make it to the booze.
WE'RE IN THE RED ZONE PLAY THRU THE PAIN
It feels like I was drinking gasoline last night.
He called me Kitten either just because or he figured out my old s&m life. Either way huge turn on.
No biggie, just trying to keep my liver function in the green
I couldn't figure out what was more important, finishing the shot or putting out the fire on my leg.
I got off F O U R times, just because he wanted to hear me moan. He is my hero.
And I think she just drunkenly ordered an ipad. she said it was so pretty she couldn't keep it "locked up" because an ipad has to be let free.
Randomize
