dont quote avril lavinge. im to drunk.
she claims you yelled BOMBS AWAY when you came. tell me she's lying
but she didn't tell you i squeezed, built up pressure, and napalmed her face as i yelled it, did she
and he thought i came like four times in 2 mins. my leg just kept cramping up
let me put it this way. im never saying "join in or get out" again unless i know whos in the room.
I got my parents high. They've been watching spongebob for six hours. You cannot tell me I'm not the favorite
he left me a note this morning. it said "thank you for letting me touch you"
i don't know where i am. i made bad decisions. i think this guy is dead.
I'm sorry. I know you didn't expect me to be arm deep in vagina when you walked through the door.
Find out what day classes start and I will come down to Richmond that weekend. Any broad who claims to be 18-21 will be promptly ID'd. My job has trained me to spot a fake from a mile away, and I don't need a statutory rape charge.
It took him 5 seconds to cum and then he wanted to hold my hand all night
The guy at the Apple store said the warranty does NOT cover getting cum out of the keyboard. I can't believe I believed you.
You came home with a traffic cone and said, "this is my birthday condom."
lets go to sea world and you can just hit on every guy in a wetsuit until you get lucky
My apologies. I'll try not to let my dick interfere with official work duties in the future.
Dude, he came to our house with a beer can in his hand dressed up in a chicken suit screaming, "free eggs!" then threw up and passed out in the front yard.
Randomize
