He's marrying her, which means that she is his most important person in the world, so you gotta deal with it...okay?
I got chris browned last night
Vomit. Vomit. Whatever. You wear a tiara in public.
I don't know, I don't really wanna ask the question, "Mom why am I not circumcised?"
Wow that was a lesbian tornado.
Could be my worst decision since the whole 'third degree burn' fiasco.
No, the weekend was great. It was the waking up in the pond in the raft without an oar that sucked. That fucking water is cold at 7am.
Im the macgyver of cooling down beers. The toilet tank was blocked so I couldn't use it.....
Excellent idea. Nothing says "congrats for resurrecting yourself, Jesus" like Greygoose at noon!
He put on a roller derby documentary. It was either bore myself to death watching that or take off my dress. He was very appreciative.
They just broke the window so they could get in and smoke the taxi driver out...
Dude she tried to bite my face off last night, literally. I have never actually felt like a piece of meat until that point in life...
Come home, I'm drunk on the porch and pretending to smoke breadsticks like cigarettes. Enticing, right?
I'm trying to fuck him and feed him. I don't understand why it isn't working.
Guy just rode past on a lowrider bike smoking a blunt, I want his life
Randomize
