i am so fucked up that i think i'm playing snood in my head.
well..are you winning?
Is it bad that I voted for Scott Brown because I want to fuck him?
Nah. I did too.
It's officially time to start saving up weed money for the NCAA tournament
Important life lesson - flammable and inflammable mean the same thing
For some reason i am carrying prostate cancer brochures. i am nor used to drinking this early.
I have bruises on my ass from her spurs. God bless Texas.
I wonder what acid is like for a blind person... Can we find this out?
im in the library and there's this guy on a computer just staring at a google image of beer. finals week is rough.
No. I either had a 6 minute orgasm or I had so many I lost count. I'm still not sure.
Locals got pissed I was talking to the barmaid. Tried to tell me that they keep all the good beer at "a Soho walkup" Google saved me
My inner pteradactyl is also confused.
You knocked on your freshman year room door, told the kids who opened it "I own you", and attempted to force-feed them everclear.
We peed on campus in the middle of the tailgate and then hit on a married cop that asked you to stop touching him
Goddamnit, guys. I got lube all over my kindle.
you asked how they got the microwave in the air. we had to explain three times that it was mounted there until you finally feel asleep
Randomize