Well he paid for dinner, so I paid for the Plan B, but the parking ticket I got is totally his responsibility.
No one actually likes Tequila. They just accept it as a fact of life. Like hpv.
im sitting in a tub with a sombrero on.. im just kind of confused.
if the best thing you can say about him is "he probably wont kill me" you may want to rethink hanging out with him
how do you feel about lunch break shots ?
Where are you and who are these girls passed out on the floor?
and why are they spooning a flamingo?
they traded weed for a spot on our floor. be nice.
I'm cheerleading for traffic. people are staring. Why am i the only high person on the way to class?
Now the circle is complete. Just interviewed a guy who was a higher up member of the team I worked for in my job before this place
I came home to him frying bacon to put in his beer. He said bacon beer lights, taste the awesomer rockies
Dude just the look on his face when she sat down next to him, threw one leg over his, and just said "so..." was fucking amazing
Well after the shots I danced with a homeless guy, split my toe on broken glass, and had a 20 piece mcnugget. Who says postgrad life is boring.
Sent him a snap chat of him eating me out so he can relive the moment.
Mom has wine in a to go cup. It's that kind of night.
I might go bald with this hair pulling thing every night.
It's not christmas until we're acting sober in front of grandma
Randomize