he keeps dipping things in ranch and feeding them to me
CONFIRMATION: i wiki searched it and Justin Bieber is 15 not 13. so i dont feel like as much of a pedofile now....
So he saw that playlist i made with his name as the title. i think he's creeped out that I have 106 songs that remind me of him
tonight is going to be epic. can you pre-book an ambulance?
who the fuck is that kid sitting with you...
I don't have any fucking idea. I woke up and he was there. I'm kinda creeped out.
I'm gonna need you to NOT let me play duck duck goose with three racoons in the middle of the street next time.
How did I roll 7 times this month and survive?\nI must be some sort of ecstasy goddess
Bro my mom is in for two days and you can't even hold back on the drinking she said as she left i hope he doesn't always pee his pants and he is sure popular with the girls wtf
Defrosting my uncrustable with my laptop...Hungover dinner
I feel like the devil is trying to impregnate me through my eyeballs.
Maybe next year when I'm 30 I will be over puking at lunch on Fridays. Maybe
I was using my Beauty and the Beast blanket as a makeshift skirt because no pants
I'm high and having a granola buffet this has got to be the healthiest I have ever been
I have a few Facebook friends I only keep around for quality control purposes on Tinder
Text me some of your sweat
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