I want leopard sheets
haha sexcapades
thats the plan
You even been so high breaking up weed with your fingers feels like surgery?
You guys were grinding to YMCA. I knew you were going to hook up with him.
I woke up to blood crusted on my face. I don't understand
team rage. no explanation necessary
She was our DD the least I could do is have sex with her. Even when drunk I'm still chivalrous.
He kept making me pretend I was his personal trainer. When I swallowed his cum he made me pretend I was drinking a protein shake. Thats actually what it tasted like.
There where 3 half naked girls passed out on the pool table, I crawled under it and just as I was about to go to sleep some guy walks up and says: "dude nice spot" walks away and comes back with a pillow.
I seriously think I got run over last night.. My sides are bruised and I got a ride home in the limo from the office.
She's drunk as hell locked up I. The bathroom with my shoes where do I go from here
You tried to get the Waffle House waitress to put a candle in your cheesy hash browns.
He's so twisted that he's acting out Dragon Ball-Z by himself. The Tanquray and THC combo doesn't play around.
I ended up in bed with a man from London in a sorority wing I am not apart of. Tequila fucks you up
The chances of me making out with someone next weekend are about the same as me not remembering it.
I'm perplexed as to why anyone on this planet is straight
Wait, there's no way I said I would suck his dick. I know drunk Katie.
No, you told him to suck YOUR dick.
See now that sounds like drunk Katie.
Randomize
